I have a piece published in The Hoot this week, although you wouldn’t know it by looking at The Hoot. This is because instead of “By Nathan Robinson,” Brandeis University’s Community Newspaper decided that it would rather print “By Maxwell Price” in the byline. No, I don’t know why they did this.
The story (it’s short, don’t worry) goes like this: On Wednesday, Sept. 17th at approximately 2:07 p.m. I received an email from one Maxwell Price. The email said this:
Hey Nathan,
My name is Max Price and I am the new editor of the culture/arts section of the Hoot. I wanted to tell you how much I enjoyed your insightful piece about the Hoffman autobiography and also to let you know that it will be published this week. See the attachment with a few small changes I made.
Also, if you’re interested in helping to carry on Hoffman’s tradition, come to Pom 502 at 11pm tonight for a meeting of P.O.Y.A. (Pissed off Youth of America), an organization I recently founded. For more info you can contact me or just show up tonight. Thanks!
-Max
Well, I didn’t go to his club. Not that I’m not a pissed off youth, which I am, though whether I am “of America” is debatable. But 11pm is past my bedtime, and besides, I try to avoid ever venturing into East Quad. I hear it has house centipedes, and those things are horrifying.
I think, though, that I may have made Max Price hate me. I did not mean to do this. From his email, he sounds like a very nice man. It’s bubbly and warm. Maybe he and I can still be friends someday. I hope so. If he gives me a hug and a high-five next time I see him, we’ll pretend nothing happened. And he and I can start a revolution together, or maybe go out for a sandwich.
Anyway, my point is this. Go and read the article. It can be found here.
Abbie Hoffman is worth learning about, whether it’s from me or bloody Maxwell Price. Hoffman’s autobiography is worth your time, and Brandeis ought to build a statue of him.
Maybe The Hoot can publish a correction someday, although I’m not sure how much good that will do (Have you ever read a newspaper’s corrections sections, and if so, why on earth did you do that?). I don’t want to sound too overdramatic about this, though. It’s only a two-word byline. I’m not issuing an order to Bring Me The Head Of Maxwell Price, although if you could thumb your nose at him when you see him, I’d appreciate it. All this means is that I don’t get to brag about being published in The Hoot this week, as much of an honor as that would have been. I had been looking forward to having many conversations like this:
ME: Hey, I have a piece in The Hoot this week!
PERSON: Oh, yeah, I saw that! Nice work, Nathan!
Now it’s going to be more like:
ME: Hey, I have a piece in The Hoot this week!
PERSON: No you don’t. I have already perused this week’s edition, and you are not in it.
ME: No, look, that article right there! *points to article*
PERSON: That article is written by Maxwell Price.
ME: But not really! I ghostwrote it! I swear!
PERSON: Nathan Robinson, you’re a lying sack of crap.
But I suppose I shouldn’t really be bothered about it. They also misspelled the word “alumnus” in the headline, so at least Mr. Maxwell Price gets the blame for that spelling travesty instead of me.
Read everything you can about Abbie Hoffman, though. It will make you a better person. Check out the autobiography, and also read Steal This Book, which is available for free online. Also, Armies of the Night by Norman Mailer is a great account of the 1967 March On The Pentagon, and all of Hoffman’s other, more obscure works are worth a read too.
Oh, and let me just make clear that I bear no animosity toward Maxwell Price, and do actually seriously harbor a sincere hope that he and I can be friends or something.
Firstly, Max Price is a very nice guy, and from what I’ve seen he’s very pro-hugs and high fives. Secondly, your piece was one of the few in this edition’s art section that I read. Nicely done!
Mr. Robinson,
First, let me extend my sincerest apologies about the byline mix-up. I assure you that as soon as I discovered that you’d caught wise to my mischievous ploy, I contacted Sri, one of the Hoot editors, immediately. We agreed that next week’s front page headline will read, “Corrupt Hoot Editor Sends Brandeis Activists into Frenzy.”
Second, I want to assuage your fears by explaining that the incident was in no way accidental. You see, your article was quite well written and covered a person I admire rather greatly. I reasoned that it would be simpler to steal your glory than to attempt to trump it. It’s really that simple.
Please don’t let that trifling little gaffe spoil your feelings about our newspaper or dissuade you from contributing in the future. Do let’s grab a sandwich some time, far away from East Quad and its centipedes. Perhaps beneath the future statue of Abbie Hoffman?
Sincerely,
Maxwell “the Devil” Price
D’awwwwww.
But for real, Nathan, what “changes” did Price make to the piece? Were they grounds enough to alter the byline? Did he notify you in advance that you were going to be a ghostwriter? I want to hear from an in-the-know Hoot editor; I hope it was a genuine mistake.
Still, great piece. I should learn more about Hoffman, as he is a total badass.
Oh, yeah… There exists no point in reading Steal This Book, especially when Revolution for the Hell of It is relatively more important.
First and foremost, every time I read one of your posts, I impose a horrific British accent on top of it. It certainly adds to the humor, but my head’s version of your accent is rubbish.
Now, Nathan, you know I enjoy reading about and discussing Abbie Hoffman as much as possible. Still, no statue! I’ll fight for his right to be listed among notable alumni, but I will not fight for a statue! The man led a remarkable life, of course, but if a statue was to be erected on Brandeis grounds, I would support a 20-foot Eleanor Roosevelt before I ever suggested anything-Hoffman. It’s one thing to be a revolutionary. It’s another thing to be a revolutionary who actually produces meaningful results.
Then again, that NYSE antic was pretty great…